Tuesday, January 11, 2005

You Know You're a Mommy When:

- Instead of thinking "I wonder if anyone will see that little spot down by the hem" you think, "Well, if I pull my jacket down far enough, no one will see that big spot. Besides, they don't stink too bad yet."

- ...you can balance your checkbook, talk on the phone and open your mail all at the same time while sitting on the pot........'CAUSE THAT'S THE ONLY FREE TIME YOU HAVE...

- Boogers don't scare you any more. Unless you can't get them off your fingers.

- It doesn't matter if the whites and the dog towels and the baby stuff all get mixed up together in the washer. At least you can walk thru the laundry room now.

- YOU are the one saying.........."just wait 'til you have kids........."

- That baby that "will NEVER sleep in your bed" is now sleeping in your bed while hubby sleeps on the living room floor. Because at SOME point this week, you DO need to sleep.

- You set land mines at the front door when baby is napping, because the next person that wakes her up is GONNA DIE SUCKER!!!!!!!!!

- The Johnson's "having a baby changes everything" commercials make you cry. So do the life insurance commercials.

- Your heart is so big, you can't believe it.

Friday, January 07, 2005

Patty thoughts: Gonna try the Blog This! Option.

Well, I am back after a few days. Okay, I may not be able to post every day. My days consist a lot now of cleaning up poop, getting spit at, picking up fuzz and wiping noses. Well, enough about Obie and Smudge. Haha. Wow. Never realized how much I could love a little one. Annalynn is the joy of my life. Makes her poppy cry. All he has to do is look at her. She waved at me last night. Not just a chance gesture, but a real wave. A wave that said, "I see you. Hello momma. I'm here." I was in Day's office which he refers to as "ONE BIG ASS LAUNDRY ROOM." And I was watching her play in her room at about 11:00 last night. Yes, I mean PM. And when she realized I was gone, she looked up and we locked eyes. She got this cute little grin on her face. I waved at her. And she raised that little arm right up and waved right back. Hmmmmmmmmm well, now that I come to think of it, it looked more like a Hitler kind of wave. Nah. I waved again. That little arm shot up and she just smiled. I'm tellin ya folks. Wait til you have kids, those of you that don't. (Hmmmmm, that's mostly who reads this stuff. People that have TIME.) Time, a very precious commodity in this day. I know now what it means in Proverbs 31 when it speaks of "....her light burns far into the night." I used to think, "well lady, just go to bed." HAHAHA. Nope, that's the only time you get stuff DONE. Like putting my mindless ramblings on to the internet for all to see. Baring my soul to the world. My friends all moved away. Well, most of them, so now I turn to my beautiful computer monitor for companionship. Thanks for listening. Nite John boy. (why didn't they ever say "Elizabeth girl? was he gender confused???)

Saturday, January 01, 2005

First order of business

This has griped me for some time now and I finally have a platform to address it. It is a problem that has become so common, it is just accepted now. If this is offensive to you, please forgive me and just skip this post. The problem is.....................better sit down.................the misused apostrophe. Yes, I know there are those of you out there who have probably wished for years you had the nerve to address this and have been suffering in silence, but here it is now, out in the open. Okay, as I understand it, when I learned about this in GRADE SCHOOL, the apostrophe was used in place of a missing letter or letters. Like "you're" as used in the sentence "You're going way too fast honey, please slow down." You see, I am trying to say YOU ARE going too fast but I leave out the "a" and insert an '. (doesn't really save much time or ink, but someone thought this up...) It is also used to indicate posession. No not the demonic kind, but rather, for example "That is Susie's puppy." See, it belongs to Susie. I was taught that the apostrophe is like a little hand pulling something towards the owner, imagine the apostrophe the way most people write it, not like on this keyboard, but it is curved a little. So it's pulling the puppy towards Susie. The apostrophe is NOT to be used to pluralize something. For example, "There are too many car's on the highway." THAT IS INCORRECT USAGE OF THE APOSTROPHE. So STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I saw a billboard a few years back that has haunted me e're since (see, the ' replaced the "v", now you're catching on.....) It said "The new FORD'S are here." Put out by the Ford Motor Company. WOW WOW WOW WOW. Who missed that one????????????????????? So if you can forward this to as many people as possible, and correct the mistake when you see it, maybe we can stop this epidemic from reaching mass proportions. Just discussing this to the extent that I have, I need to go lie down and have some chocolate and put a cold rag on my head. Nice chatting with y'all............